Easier to Run
by shipper-swabbie
Summary: Rachel finds out. Alternate reveal for 2x09: Special Education. Rated T for language. Second  and final  chapter up! R&R please! I'll love you forever!
1. Chapter 1

A/N: OH HAAAY! Long time, no write- RIGHT? (LOLOLOL) You wanna know whhhy? Because I've been busy collab'n with the marvellous Quincer on, "Let's Get These Teen Hearts Beating Faster"! Seriously, check it out. It's FR. Bitches LOVE FR.

But let's talk about this story. Like I did last year, I got bored waiting for Sectionals 2.0, so I wrote about it! Rumour has it Rachel finds out... Angst is supposed to happen! And GOD DAMN, if I don't love me some angst... There's supposed to be a second chapter, but who knows! Maybe if I get enough encouragement, (*cough*REVIEWS*cough*) I'll be more eager to add that second chapter!

Just sayin...

The title comes from Linkin Park's song (you guessed it!) "Easier to Run"! Check it out. You might get why I picked it for mah title.

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**Disclaimer**: Iz not mine. Y'all know RM (and Ian. And Brad.) is the glorious bastard who created these munchkins... And Chester Bennington is responsable for the title. But I bet you knew that too!

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**Easier to Run**

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Finn was sitting up on his bed, tossing a football up and down in the air. He was in a great mood. He and Rachel were just about to go out for their seven month anniversary; they were going to go bowling for the first time since they started dating. He would _finally_ be able to teach his girlfriend how to throw a bowling ball properly, to have celebratory kisses with her in a public area without feeling like a complete jerk like he had last year.

They've been planning to go bowling for a while now, but with everything that had been happening with the Glee club those past few weeks, they've been a little distracted.

Finn nearly dropped the football as his thoughts turned to Kurt. Everything was falling apart in Glee since Kurt left. Everyone was questioning their togetherness, not knowing which way was right. It was very hard to believe they could be winners when everyone felt so alone.

Thank God he had Rachel. He didn't know what he would do if that started falling apart, too. But she had _just _told him she was in love with him. They promised they would never break-up.

Everything was _perfect, _except for one thing: _Santana. _

Santana had been acting so odd since the wedding; really handsy, paying more attention to all the boys in Glee; especially Finn. He was sure Rachel had noticed.

He knew she would never admit it out loud, but seeing him speak with those other girls must have made her uncomfortable; especially with a girl like Santana. He wondered if Rachel sensed something between the two- Nothing sexual or unresolved- just the kind of tension that a lie creates between the people involved.

Every time he looked at Santana, all he could see was the hurt on Rachel's face if she ever found out. He grunted and threw his foot ball against the wall. Why was he so stupid? Why did he listen to _Santana_? She was the devil. Sure, she was right, it would make Rachel jealous, knowing what he had done, but he didn't want that- not anymore. He _never _wanted to hurt her.

He rubbed his face and got ready for his shower. He reminded himself that he was supposed to be in a good mood, not sulking alone in his room over something that happened almost a year ago.

Finn shut the bathroom door shut a little harder than he needed to. Rachel will be over soon, that was something to look forward to, right?

So why did he feel so _awful_?

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When he stumbled out of the bathroom twenty minutes later, he was shocked to find Rachel sitting in contemplation on his tiny, unmade bed.

He looked up and thanked Cheesus that he had changed in the bathroom. Things could have gotten really awkward really fast if he walked to his bedroom naked like he used to before the Hummels moved in.

"Hey!" He said trying, and failing, to mask his surprise, "You're early!"

She seemed- off. Quieter than usual and very still on his bed, "You didn't come to Glee tonight."

"Yeah," Finn said, her cold greeting making him uncomfortable, "Coach Beiste had a team meeting after school and I didn't have time for that _and_ Glee."

"Artie and Sam made it to Glee."

"Yeah, but we have our date tonight! I needed time to get ready first!" He said throwing his towel and dirty clothes into a hamper, then joining Rachel on his bed.

She still wasn't looking at him. Something must have been wrong. Had something happened to her? Before he could ask, she was talking again.

"It doesn't matter," she finally said with a sad smile, "Everyone was acting weird at Glee club today. Santana said something- But it's crazy right? You never would have- unless... Oh, God." she said, face collapsing into her hands. She made some strange, unfamiliar squeaking sound.

_Oh, shit, _Finn thought. This was not good. He looked away from her and felt as though his bed would fall through the floor. The whole world spun and Finn couldn't speak.

"It _is_ true, isn't it?" She asked with disbelief.

"Please don't make me say it..."

Rachel half-scoffed, half-sobbed, "I think you're going to have to!"

"Rachel, come on. Don't be like that! I was a _mess _last year when you were with that Jesse jerk! I wanted to be with you _so badly-"_

She interrupted him with a audible sob, "So you just jumped in bed with the next best thing?"

"Well Rachel, up until a couple of days ago, I thought you had done the same thing!"

"Oh, so that makes it all better?" She spat.

"That's not my point!"

"Then _please_, tell me Finn, what was the point? What about always being honest with each other?" It was becoming difficult to understand her over her sobs. The tears ran like rivers down her face.

Finn tried to swallow over the bolder in his throat, but it felt like he was choking.

Dammit, she was never supposed to know about this. Especially not from _Santana. _Why was he so stupid? Why didn't he just tell her in the first place? He could swear he could taste bile.

She went on, tearing his heart apart with every word, "Tell me Finn, what if you knew you could have gotten away with it? Would you have gone on lying to me for the rest of our lives? Because, honestly, I feel like I don't even know you anymore!"

"Rachel, I wouldn't have done that to you!"

"Oh, but when I was being honest and open with you last week about my virginity, It didn't occur to you that maybe you could be honest about yours, too?"

Finn rubbed at his face with self-loathing. He hated what she was doing to him, he had never felt so worthless in his life, but what was worse? What this was doing to her.

Up until a few seconds ago, she was wearing a hole in his floor from pacing so much. Now she had stopped in front of him and she just stared down him expectantly; begging, _pleading_ for him to undo it.

"Rachel, I didn't want to lose you," he mumbled shamefully in response.

Rachel's expression turned from pained to infuriated, "So you just lied to me instead? _Great _idea, Finn. You must have _really_ thought that one through!" She spat, making for his bedroom door.

"Rachel wait!" He cried, bolting from his bed and pushing the door closed as she pulled it open slightly, "Just- wait."

She held onto the door knob and shook silently with tears. Finn shuffled towards her and rested his head on her trembling shoulder, she hadn't turned to face him.

Maybe it was better that he couldn't see her, he thought. He didn't know if he could see her like this. He closed his eyes and just let the tears burn under his eyelids; he deserved it, "Just don't leave it like this."

Rachel made a choking sob and turned very slowly to face him. He lifted his hand and stroked her cheek with his thumb, "Don't." He begged.

She relinquished to his familiar touch, but only for a moment before pulling his hand away from her, almost _too_ gently, "Jesus Christ, Finn. _Santana?" _She whimpered, voice breaking over trembling lips.

He squeezed his eyes shut and prayed she didn't see the rogue tear that rolled down his cheek.

"I have to go."

"Rachel-"

"_Please, _Finn!" She actually shouted, "Just let me go!" Her tone softened to a plea, "Just for now, let me go."

His eyes shot opened in disbelief. Why did she say that? Why did it sound so _final?_ She promised- she told him she would _never _break up with him. Did she lie? Was she really ready to end it over _this_?

He took a step back, completely numb, mouth hung open, unable to understand what had just happened.

He didn't know how long he stood there, he wasn't even sure he heard her leave.

But she left him there, in his room, all alone. Could he even remember where his own bed was? He stumbled backwards, until his the back of his heel bumped into something cold, heavy and round, half sticking out from under his bed.

Why the fuck did he have a _bowling ball_ in his room? Bitch move, universe. Where the hell did it come from? What was even the the point?

_What was the point? _She had asked him. He wished he knew, _God, _he wished he knew.

He kicked the bowling ball in a blind rage but didn't even feel the pain until he had collapsed on his bed sobbing like a child.

He pulled his pillow over his head, wishing this would all go away. Wishing he was at that bowling alley. Wishing she was with him.

He sent her fourteen sad, pathetic, desperate messages that night and only got one message in response: "Not now Finn."

That was the end of it, he conceded to sleep. Maybe tomorrow it would be better.

_Maybe it won't, _something cruel and truthful reminded him.

At least he would see her; that made everything a little better.

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A/N2: I LOVE YOU FOR READING! Do you love ME? Tell me in a review! (Or not. If you hate me, it's cool. I get it.) KISSES! xoxoxo


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: WHAT? WHAT IS THIS? AN UPDATE? UNBELIEVABLE! Did y'all think I forgot about you? I didn't! I just got super busy, and I'm sorry about that! I hope you're all still interested in this story! This chapter _killed_ me but I'm so proud of it! I hope you enjoy it! It's kinda AUish now, but whatever. I wanted resolution with the Finn/Santana issue after "Furt" so that's where _this _came from originally.

Feedback is just _swell, _so don't be shy!

Hey you know what else? You can check out mine and Quibily's story "Let's Get These Teen Hearts Beating Faster". It was funsies and is now complete... You know, if you're interested :)

Are you guys all done with this sex-lies nonsense? ME TOO! Let's never speak of it again... After this fic.

LOVE YOOU!

Disclaimer: IS NO MINE! RM BF AND IB OWN IT... AND YOUR SOOUL.

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_If I could... Retrace all the mistakes I've made I would - 'Easier to Run' Linkin Park_

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The malicious screech of his alarm clock stirred awake Finn the next morning. He slammed his hand on the snooze button with more vigour than necessary and turned away from it.

He had slept for what felt like 6 days the night before, but he was still tired. When the events of last night came rushing back to his consciousness, he was just _exhausted._

Girls were so complicated. How was he supposed to make it better with Rachel when she refused to speak with him?

He reached underneath his pillow and felt around for his phone. Maybe she'd come to her senses while he was asleep and sent him _something. _He finally found it, pushed between the mattress and the bed frame, and read the caption carefully.

"_New text message. Read now?"_

Finn was wide awake now. It had to be her. He felt like a weight had been lifted and couldn't help but smile. Did she forgive him already? God, he hoped so.

He stared at his phone screen for what seemed like forever. Before clicking _"Accept"._

_"Rachel: **Duplicate Msg** Not now Finn."_

What? His fucking phone screwed up! This wasn't a new message at all! He already got that one! What the hell?

He threw his phone into his bed and resisted the urge to kick his furniture again. He learned his lesson last night and his toe still fucking hurt. _Everything _hurt.

Frustrated, he rubbed his hands over his face and through his hair. He fell into his bed and curled up into the fetal position. He just wanted to go back to sleep and wait for Rachel to call him.

"Finn, honey? Are you awake? You're going to be late for school! It's almost eight o'clock!"

Right, he had real life waiting for him. Mom, glee, school.

_Rachel will be there, _something told him. He needed to stay positive. Maybe she's just waiting to see him in person to talk about everything. Rachel _loved _talking about relationship stuff.

Finn figured as long as he showed up for school she _had_ to talk to him... even if it was just to yell at him. He didn't care, he would take anything. If she was dumping him over this... He didn't even want to think about it. It made him weak.

What's more, he didn't _need _to think about that just yet. This was their first big fight. He needed to take this one step at a time. He needed to shower. Get dressed. Go to school. He needed to stay focused.

But it was hard; all he could think about was Rachel.

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School was awful. He spend all his time between classes searching for Rachel. Every time he caught so much as a glimpse at her, she was gone in a instant; off to her next class or ducking into the girls' bathroom.

When lunch time had finally rolled around, Kurt informed Finn, via text, that Rachel was spending her the whole period in the girls bathroom and that he shouldn't bother trying to talk to her.

Why didn't she tell him herself? Were they in grade two again?

Finn felt a tinge of rage flare up inside of him. What was wrong with her? Since when was Rachel scared of talking something out?

He clenched his jaw. She was making this harder than it needed to be. For once in their relationship, Finn actually wanted to have a Serious Conversation with her, and what? She kept running away?

This was all making him crazy. _She _was making him crazy.

So, since he was crazy anyway, he decided to spend his entire lunch break staking out the girl's bathroom until she came out. He wasn't giving up that easy. He _needed _to talk to her.

The five minute warning bell chimed for 6th period, and Rachel emerged from the bathroom sniffling and hugging her books tightly to her chest.

"Hey." He said softly, his anger dissolving immediately when he saw her red-brimmed eyes.

She jumped a little and took a step back. She hiccuped and mumbled, "W-what are you doing here?"

"Are you mad at me?" He asked unceremoniously.

"No."

"Then why won't you talk to me? Can you _please_ just talk to me?"

"No." She started to move away from him.

"Rachel, what the hell?"

"Finn, please, we're going to be late for bio..."

"Are you breaking up with me?"

"No! Finn, please-"

"Why won't you talk to me?"

"Because it's yucky!" She shouted finally, "_Santana, _Finn? Really? I don't think there's a worse person you could have slept with in this entire _school_!" There must have been at least fifty students watching them, but she didn't seem to care. Finn didn't know what to say, so he just stared, too. She was crying as she shouted now, "I know it's juvenile and inarticulate and completely irrational, but it's _yucky_, Finn! And I'm sorry, but you can't just apologise and expect that to go away!"

She turned quickly and ran the gauntlet of judgemental glares to her next class. She tried and failed to hide her face from her peers' prying eyes. Fast on her heels was an eruption of whispers and snickers from their audience until the official bell for class rang. All the students dispersed, still muttering amongst themselves.

Finn decided class was a bad idea and hid in his car for the remainder of the day.

He had no idea how to make things right with Rachel. At least he understood where she was coming from, now. When he thought she had slept with Jesse last year, he felt sick to his stomach.

Maybe she just needed some space for a while. She said she wasn't breaking up with him, so that was the bright side of everything. But she wasn't exactly _with him_ at the moment either.

He felt like he was missing a part of himself when she wasn't around. He loved her so much, it was going to be hard to give her that space and time she apparently needed.

He pressed his head against the steering wheel. This was a _mess. _

He sat there for a little while longer until he pieced together the motivation to move again. He checked the clock, it was 2:10. It was too late for last period, so he decided to head into the choir room early. They had Glee rehearsal at 2:45. Maybe he could catch up on the homework he didn't do last night.

He chuckled to himself. Yeah, _right. _But it would make Rachel happy, so maybe.

_If she ever speaks to you again... _That cruel, but honest voice told him again.

He sighed heavily and slung his back-pack over his shoulder. Baby steps. Glee, Rachel, singing and maybe someday, if he plays his cards right, forgiveness.

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At around 2:35, Finn expected the glee kids to start showing up, but the room was still empty, which was odd. They all hung out almost every Thursday at 2:30 before glee practice.

He started packing up his books (he did do a bit of his homework while he was waiting) and decided that maybe glee was cancelled today. He was just about to leave to go speak to Mr. Schue, when he all but ran over Santana on the way out.

"Hey, big guy." She said low and sultry.

"Um, hey. Is Glee still on today? Where's Brittany? You guys always come to glee together..."

"She's with all the other glee kids. I asked her to show them some of her new moves today in the auditorium before practice."

She took several slow, purposeful steps towards him, "I wanted some alone time with you."

Finn was starting to feel really uncomfortable, but she was getting so close to him he couldn't think. She continued, pushing him down into a nearby chair, "Rumour has it that you and The King of the Dwarves are dunzo. Need a good rebound date? I'll help you get over her by getting on _you-"_

She was standing over him with either one of her hands on his shoulders trapping him in the chair. That was it for him, he raised both his hands inside her arms and pushed them down to the side, freeing himself from her grasp, "Santana, _stop this!" _He told her firmly standing up and nudging her way from him, "First at the wedding, now _this? _You need to back off."

She face shifted from seductive to furious, "What the hell, Frankenteen? You treat that midget like a freaking _queen_ and she's _disgusting_! I bet she hasn't even put out for you yet! Think about it, Finn, I could do things to you that that tranny of yours couldn't even _dream_ of!"

"Enough! Do you know why I act like that around Rachel? It's because I'm in love with her, Santana!" He said almost shouting at her. She stepped away from him unconsciously, and he continued, "There's more to it than just _sex. _Sure, I love her and I wouldn't mind maybe, someday, being with her like that, but that's not what it's about! It's the kind of love that keeps me up at night, and makes me crazy when I'm not around her. The kind of love that I've never felt with another person in my entire life, and honestly? I don't want to feel like that about anyone except her."

Santana crossed her arms over her chest protectively and tried not to flinch at his words.

"Santana, sleeping with you was a _mistake_. One I _never _want to make again! It meant nothing to me and I'm sorry I wasted my v-card on someone like you."

His rant was interrupted by an audible sob from across the room. The two of them looked up to see a tiny brunette clutching a stack of books, thicker than her, against her chest.

"Hi." Rachel said sniffling, "Um, I didn't mean to interrupt, but I have your homework from the classes you missed, Finn." She sniffled and half-laughed, "I would have been here earlier, but-"

"Rachel!" He said taking two extra steps away from Santana, "I'm sorry, she just sorta came at me- but I stopped her-"

"I don't care," Rachel laughed-sobbed dropping the books on the floor and almost running to him. She pushed past Santana, flung her arms around his neck and kissed him as best she could on only her tip-toes, "I don't care." She said breaking apart from him and smiling brilliantly, "I love you _so much, _Finn_."_

His face morphed into that adorable sideways grin that Rachel loved so much, and he said, "I love you, too."

Finn swooped down and picked her up the best he could. She wrapped her legs around his hips and they kissed again with heat and passion. Santana scoffed in disgust and slithered away.

Rachel was still straddling him when their kissed ended, and Rachel held his face close to her own smiling down expectantly at him.

"So," he said, holding on to her rear-end for support, "You heard all of that?"

"Yup." She said excitedly.

"I um, I hope your not mad about you know, what I said... about..." he paused for a moment and whispered the last part, "_sex_."

She laughed at him in response, "Are you kidding me? If you keep this up you won't have to wait until 'someday', baby."

Finn tried to stop his jaw from hitting the floor. "Do you mean- _today?"_

"No," She said simply, pushing way from him and sliding down his legs to the floor. She staggered slightly, her knees were a little weak from that kiss, "No, not _today, _silly!" she added, pulling on his hand towards the door, "We still have glee!" She released his hand to pick up the books she dropped earlier, "Plus I need to help you get caught up on those classes you missed today." She continued, handing him all the books she picked up, one by one, "_Really, _Finn, I know we were both upset today, but that's no excuse to miss class!"

Once all the books where neatly stacked in his arms, Rachel retrieved his back-pack from where he had been sitting and slung the bag over his left shoulder. Finn was beginning to feel like a pack mule, but that was OK. He was _her _pack mule.

"Come, Finn." She held on to his elbow and pulled him out of the choir room, "We have to get the club together and finish practice early, you have _a lot _of homework to do, mister. Where are they, anyway?"

"Oh," Finn laughed finding impossible not to smile, "They're in the auditorium!"

"Excellent, we'll just have practice there! I'll go get Mr. Schuester, and you go tell the club we've changed the location for practice." She let go of his arm and started down the hall. He watched her with a new found appreciation for _everything _she said and did. _Just when he thought her couldn't love her anymore_-

"Oh and Finn?" She said, turning around about ten feet away from in the deserted hallway, "If you do very well studying tonight, I have something very special I want to try with you, but you have to finish _all _of your homework first, baby. Got it?"

Finn's jaw dropped again and he had to be careful he didn't lose his grip on that mountain of books clasped in his arms. "Uh huh..." Was all he could manage.

_She just kept on surprising him._

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~End._

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A/N2: YOU LIKE? I did. I'd love your feedback! OH! In honour of Cory Monteith (and to lesser extent, yours truly), I threw in a little Canadianism in there. Can you spot it?

All the best in 2011!

xoxoxo -J


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